Step 3

The next step is tricky to explain and may take a while for you to complete. The first part of this step is to look at the items you wrote down in step 2 and for each statement imagine yourself doing the opposite of what you wrote. As you imagine doing the opposite notice the most uncomfortable or worrisome or scary feelings that comes up for you.

For this step to work well you really have to reach some kind of fear. If you haven’t yet found a fear then you might ask yourself “and what would be the worst about that for me?” In considering doing the opposite of the items you wrote in step 2 you have to get to a place where you feel yourself at risk in some way. Most people are a bit embarrassed by what they uncover – it has a cringe element.

Typical issues that come up for people in this first part of this step are fears of looking stupid, of being out of control, of being humiliated or being helpless and so on. You need to identify one such fear or worry with each of the statements you wrote in step 2.

Write down the fears that you identify in this step.

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